The Return Of The Freshers Flu

by Nicola Dawson on 5.11.08

You’re Sick.

OK I mean ill, not sick in the head, although who am I to say. No, I refer to ‘Fresher’s ‘Flu’, the illness which strikes down as many as 90% (yes really) of our beloved students each year.

It’s most likely that during your first few weeks in Manchester you’ll wake up one morning with more than a new partner and a hangover. You’ll feel rubbish, generally just cold and ‘flu symptoms, but sadly you won’t be able to kick this bitch for a good while yet.

So why is it that so many will fall prey to some sweaty, achy, mucus producing virus just as we are most likely to want to go out all the time and get laid?

Well, there are around 100,000 students in Manchester, and when a large number of 18 year olds with less than mature immune systems are chucked in from various parts of the World to join in on the fun, shit happens. Convince most of those 18 year olds to go out drinking heavily and sweat amongst each other in packed clubs, and, well, you know the rest.

You’re not going to stay in alone every night watching South Park with a box of tissues (OK some of you might but you’re the ‘sick in the head’ ones I mentioned before) so you get a few vodkas down you and go for it like a true pro, there’s no way you’re going to let a bug ruin some of the most fun weeks of your life, is there?

Thankfully there’s a way to get through. Take some advice from the following points and you should be able to navigate your way through this sickness with limited damage to your social life.

1) Vitamin C. Get some. Vitamin C helps boost your immune system, so go choose one of the many methods of ingestion down at the pharmacist (normal pills, tablets that fizz in water and taste orangey, chewy sweety type things). Something like 1,000mg a day should get you back on track.

Don’t worry about the cost, a quick phone call to your mum sounding a bit poorly should ensure the funds are paid into your account within 3 working days.

2) Drink plenty of fluids. All right you’re already doing that, ha ha, very nice. I mean try and get some water in between the beer and spirits, and whatever else might be passing through your lips these days… Alcohol dehydrates you so you need to make up for that to help your body sort itself out.

This also works for you cos when you get a few drinks down you that snotty nose will dry up somewhat, allowing for a few hours of mucus-free respite. Sadly though it will probably return with a vengeance the next day.

3) Keep warm. I might sound like your mother, but do put a jacket on when you go out. Being cold might not make you ill, but it will sure make it last longer if you’re already suffering. And this is Manchester for fks sake.

If you’re trying to avoid the cloakroom fee, take a jacket that folds up small and find a mate who’s got one of those ridiculous Mary Poppins-sized bags to stick it in. Or, pull the cloakroom attendant.

4) You’re not going to like this one, sorry. If you look like one of the undead, have mucus dribbling down your face and the headache you got from your heroic amount of units last night just won’t shift, you need to stay in.

Let’s face it, it’s not like you’re going to pull looking like that is it.

5) Eat well. It’s that whole fruit/veg 5 portions a day thing. Just try and eat some things that you know are good for you, in amongst the other stuff. Even just asking Abdul not to hold the salad on your kebab will help.

If you try and follow these points I can’t promise a full immediate recovery, but it’s highly likely you’ll return to the 24-hour party that is your first year at university a good while sooner.

Go on, while you’ve still got some of your loan left.